Blackout: How the Detroit City Council Went Crazy

In retrospect, it was great when the city of Detroit’s biggest problem was Kwame Kilpatrick, the city’s corrupt mayor who refuses to quit. Kwame lies, cheats, and steals, but that only proves he has the heart of a true politician. What makes most of us mad is that the way he does it is, well, a little too “urban.”

We’ve all witnessed it. A black person who has had just too much pressure for one day gets so fed up, they become a ticking time bomb waiting to explode. What sets them off can be anything from yet another condescending remark thrown their way, or even something as little as someone looking at them the wrong way.

The resulting volley of yelling, screaming, and fisticuffs in some occasion is known universally as a “blackout.” That’s the moment when restraint fails, and “urban tendencies” prevail.

Of course, the problem is that throughout this whole Kilpatrick fiasco, instead of the Detroit City Council helping the situation, they seem to be more prone than ever to blackout, perhaps as a result of the pressure that the Kilpatrick scandal is imposing.

The signs first became apparent last week, when the city council refused to hear a budget address by Mayor Kilpatrick. I suppose this would be a reasonable way to voice their opinion of the mayor, if not for the way they chose to do it. Rather than simply informing Kilpatrick’s office that he was not welcome, they instead chose to wait for the mayor to arrive, then send him home. It was almost as if the council passed a resolution in committee prior, to the effect of “I wish he would come over here…”. A little too urban indeed.

Now, of course questions are being raised as to the legality of the city council’s action, but that’s to be expected. No “urban” deed goes unpunished. Ever see two black guys get into it over who stepped on whose Jordans? Of course they both get arrested in the end, but I suppose the sanctity of the overly expensive tennis shoe is preserved so it’s not all in vain.

City Councilwoman Monica Conyers took it to another level, “blacking out” on the floor of a city council meeting. During the confrontation with fellow councilman Ken Cockrel, Conyers stated “You’re not my daddy… we don’t have to hear you.”  The problem of course being that Cockrel is the council president, and considering he is charged with presiding over such meetings, the facts seem to indicate that indeed council members have to hear him. This includes Monica Conyers, who is number two as council pro tempore.

Conyers continued her tirade, calling Cockrel “Shrek” (and I admit, there’s a slight resemblance). But the problem there is that we all know from the movies that Shrek’s sidekick is Donkey. Thus, if we accept Monica Conyers’ Shrek world view… well, then that makes her the ass.

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